Well we are here in Cleveland and although the traffic is INSANE the drive wasn’t nearly as bad as we thought it would be.  Troy travels to Avon Lake which is only about 30-45 minutes west of here but somehow it seems like it takes forEVER to get there.  Maybe its just because we were excited at the prospect of a new doctor and a fresh set of eyes.  Don’t get me wrong I really have been very impressed with my neurologists (both of them!) but I just didn’t feel like they were “it”.  Neither of them really had a hard core plan of attack.

On the MEDICAL side of things:

So yesterday I met with Dr. Edward Benzel.  I was very impressed with his expertise and general take on things.  He said that he wonders if the Chiari is truly significant or if it is just there.  It has the ability to be there and never affect my actual physiology.  The only way to really TELL is to do what is called a CINE MRI.  It is a specialized MRI which tracks the FLOW of CSF fluid around the cerebellum, into the spinal column and into the skull.

He said that he was also concerned that I was on Lamictal for seizures when a CAUSE of the seizures had never been determined.  He wants to further study that also. Several things were thrown out on the table that could be possible problems, none of which I really want to think about at the moment…. (bleeds or lesions or blah blah blah)… we are just going to let God have that one and HONESTLY I can tell you… I am NOT scared.  Kay Sara Sara… whatever will be will be.  The beauty of the grace is that God has promised it to us in the sun AND in the rain.

Add to that the fact that he thinks that my brain is a quandary (LOL imagine that!).  Dr. Benzel said he honestly believes that I may have a compound problem.  Instead of pinpointing and saying “THIS” is what’s wrong… we may have to say “ALL OF THESE” are wrong.  He thinks that I have headaches from multiple different things and when they all combine that is the day that I end up debilitated.

So we are here for at least another two days.  He ordered multiples tests, studies, MRI, scans, consults etc.  The one I am MOST excited about is a HEADACHE Neurologist!  He actually SPECIALIZES in headaches!!!  Can you believe it?  I am stoked!  I just hope this guy has better ideas than Percocet and Darvocet. … LOL.

On the EMOTIONAL side of things:

All in all I am VERY glad we came to Cleveland.  It is promising and that is all I need at this point.  I need hope that someone is actually going to TRY and find out what is happening and attempt to fix it, not just tell me “here is some meds have a nice life”.  Or worse yet, stop complaining if you don’t want surgery we don’t want to hear it!  I am GLAD that of all the people, a SURGEON is the one who said… we are NOT operating until we absolutely know its necessary! I am ALL for that because believe you me I am NOT interested in having my skull chopped open (at all really) unless it is absolutely necessary!  I feel like if we can find other ways to control the issues then THAT is the best possible thing!  If I NEED surgery then obviously I will put that one in God’s hands and do what is best but for now I am happy to just keep pushing through more testing to get to the “big picture” that is my brain.

I “knew that I knew” that we were MEANT to come to this appointment.  Everything worked out perfectly and I just FELT it in my heart.  Every appointment I have been to up until now has left me “wanting” something else… feeling like we were yet to find what we needed.  NOW… I have peace in knowing that someone else feels the same. I am 100% confident that Dr. Benzel wants what is BEST for me and not necessarily what is “easiest” for him.  That is the BEST than any patient can hope for.

So Cleveland is home for the next few days.  If you are praying my, specific requests for today are:

- Pray that the radiologists, medical staff, doctors, fellows etc will be BLESSED, that their paths would be made straight and that their day would be stress LESS so that their minds will be clear and their purpose in my life would be abundantly and DIVINE apparent.  As always I like to pray that their family, their friends, their work, their finances are blessed because I really feel that these people give SO much to those around them that they deserve a little extra blessing!

- Pray that God would put his hand on my body and ALLOW these people whom He has placed in my life to be able to SEE clearly what they NEED to see so that they would be able to recommend the best course of action.

- Pray for CLEAR and UNDENIABLE answers about the “problems” and SOLUTIONS for making my head “better”.

- Pray that WHATEVER this is that is causing problems would CLEARLY manifest itself and be FOUND so that it is able to be treated.  I pray that anything that is hindering this and allowing it to HIDE would be removed.

- Pray that God would continue to give Troy and I peace and hope.

- Pray that God would be with our kiddos as they are at home with my parents and without us.

- Pray for continued safe travels as we will journey into Cleveland several more times in the next few days   (we are actually staying in Oakwood Village just outside of Cleveland)

So… that is it… the update of yesterday and today.  I will write more once I have been through today’s battery of tests.  I just have to say thank you to all my bloggy friends who provide me with so much support and love.  Your emails, calls, messages, texts, mean SO much to us and really help us to smile through ANY circumstance!  I am SO glad that I have this blog to be able to come and write my feelings, fears, shortcomings, joy and praises!  Have a GREAT day today and I will write again soon!

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